This is not something that happen to me but it happen to my friend. He witness his colleague being bullied by fellow co-workers with some real nasty comments. I'll not reveal the details on a public blog but it is definitely something that make a normal person feel very injustice for the victim. Though I only hear one side of the story but I do feel strongly against those work bullies.
How does one handle such situation?
a. Will one speak up against those bullies & risk their own relationship or risk being marked?
b. Will one just offer only a listening ear & perhaps a few comforting words?
c. Will one just accept that this is the fact of life that the weak will get bullied by the aggressive or scheming one and nothing can be done to help the weak if they don't become stronger on their own?
d. Will one think we shouldn't be busybody to meddle into other issue? We have other better things to do in life like enjoyment and $$$ making.
e. Will one help to offer strong recommendations to the victim on how to handle such bullies in a no win situation?
Which of the above options would you take? Realistically, most people would probably go for option d because as long as it doesn't impact us, it doesn't matter. Some suggested option c, the self-acceptance choice.
I think I have a problem because my feeling towards the matter are non c and d options type. I don't like watching bullies get their way especially against innocent people. At the same time, I'm aware that we need to adopt an intelligent approach to handle these bullies rather than going head-on. The problem is what is the intelligent approach? There's seem no easy answer to this. Frequently, one will encounter lots of doubts or questions being posed regarding whether to help or support the victim against such bullies. Someone pointed out the fault is likely to lies with the victim because he's powerless to defend himself. Why should one help him? Accept the fact of working life. This is normal.
I remember when I wanted to rescue the stray cat out from death penalty, there are many roadblocks. It is never a straightforward process. One will encounter resistance, the book says, the high costs, the deterring thoughts of whether if this is worth the effort since its only an animal, the inconvienence, the future consideration etc. It is never easy when you wanted to do something for the weak or less fortunate and it may also not necessary pay off. You may get disappointed when things don't turn out well. Some may also think you're wasting your time, better spend on more important things in life. Some may even say there you see, I told you so when things didn't work out. Feel if one is to help the weak or less fortunate, it will be beneficial to know it is never smooth sailing, you'll get into choppy waters and rock real bad. Preseverance is key at this stage and just got to bit the teeth & go with the wind direction flow & live with the choppy waves. Calm sea and maybe the harbour will eventually come one's way. The cat was finally rescued and started to eat well. There are challenges ahead but its a encouraging sign that it did not lose its life unnecessarily. So what's the big deal about a cat life? Does it make me richer? No, in fact poorer. But it make me feel better that I did something that my heart wanted rather than brushing it off as none of my business or this is a fact of life.
How about the bully problem on my friend's end? For now, I think I'll advice him option B and possibly E if he can understand the situation better.
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